I WANT TO WEAR MAKE-UP!

My reaction to Balsam of Peru products has changed dramatically over the last 10 years.

For the first few years I continued to wear make-up, but my eyes became more and more sensitive until I could no longer wear anything on my face at all.  I know it's vain, I know it shouldn't be that important, but living in a society where 99% of women wear make-up, one feels a bit naked going out into the world bearing one's true face.

This should not be the way society works.  We should not be conditioned by the media, by advertisements, by comparing ourselves to those around us.  But we are.  It's the way humans work.  We have been taught our whole lives to constantly compare ourselves to others, to be better than others.  We are in constant competition with everyone and everything, and we want to be the best.

But I had to stop.  Either way, I thought I looked horrible.  If I wore mascara, my eyes would puff up, go red and all the skin on my eyelids would flake off.  However, if I didn't wear make-up I looked hideous!

This obviously isn't true, but it has taken me a few years to come to love my natural self.  Most days I will face the world with my full, true self with nothing to hide.  But occasionally there are days or nights or parties where I just want to live up to the competition surrounding me - after all, if we weren't competitive as a species, we wouldn't still be here.

So I started creating my own make-up out of completely natural, scent-free ingredients.

Charcoal Eyeliner

This is so simple but so effective.  It makes me wonder why we even need all the choice of eyeliners, or in fact any make-up, in the shops.  Oh yes, so multimillion dollar companies can monopolize on our need to look like those beautiful women on the front of fashion magazines.  Of course.

So, all you need is:

• activated charcoal capsules - you can get these from any health food store and if you have indegistion then these will be a double whammy purchase!
• a few drops of oil such as castor, vitamin e or coconut
• a spare little make-up pot

Just mix a few capsules of activated charcoal with a couple of drops of oil and press down into an empty, clean pot.  Use a brush to apply.  I usually use a wet brush to apply a more distictive line to my lids.

Coming up... A natural mascara recipe that does not use beeswax!

A brief chemistry lesson...

What I found confusing about this allergy is that you can't just check ingredient labels and expect to be safe.  This is because Balsam of Peru is not just one molecule, it is made up of hundreds of naturally occurring aromatic alcoholic compounds that are also found in many other natural foods.  So unfortunately, a lot of the time you just have to know where these chemicals are found.

Let's look at some molecules so we can visualize it all better.  The most frequent constituents of BOP are cinnamyl and benzoic esters, which make up between 45% - 70% of the overall composition.  More specifically, these esters are:

Benzyl benzoate

Cinnamyl cinnamate

Benzyl cinnamate

There are hundreds more aromatic compounds in B.O.P.; take a look at this page to get a broader understanding - http://www.cropwatch.org/Peru%20Balsam%20chemistry.pdf

The main problem we have is our reaction to various spices.  This is because what gives a spice its flavour is the numerous aromatic alcohols in its constitution.  All spices have these compounds in various forms and degrees.  As you can see from the names of the compounds above, cinnamon is most likely to be one of the worst for us.

Picking a spice at random, say cumin, we can look at the chemical composition and predict if it will affect is badly (http://books.google.co.uk/books?id=7KPUlXxOYZAC&pg=PA142&lpg=PA142&dq=cumin+benzyl+cinnamate&source=bl&ots=UPtek5hQEg&sig=pcWuVMET1jxIrbTX0TD_39p5VwM&hl=en&sa=X&ei=VkNyUvK-Mcel0AXkzIDoDw&ved=0CD0Q6AEwAg#v=onepage&q=cumin%20benzyl%20cinnamate&f=false ).  Straight away we can see that the essential oil of the cumin seed contains 4.47% benzyl cinnamate, and that's not taking into account all of the constituents of B.O.P.

The  bottom line- all spices are going to be a risk for us.  Not all of us will be allergic to all the constituents of B.O.P., but finding out which it is specifically will be a challenge!

A warm welcome to a life without spices

Ok bear with me, I've never written a blog before... There's a first time for everything!  Right? :)

So where do I start?  I have been allergic to Balsam of Peru for nearly 7 years since its sudden development at the age of 15.  Whilst struggling through the first 4 years using strong steroid creams every day, yet still with terrible eczema (on face, hands, etc), I remember trawling the internet for some stories and real-life experience, but there was even less information on the allergy then than there is now!

I was avoiding all fragranced creams, soaps, everything, but had sneakily pushed the lists of foods that should be avoided to the back of a draw...  It just didn't make any sense - I thought if I just didn't touch the food I was eating with my lips or my hands I would be fine.  After those 4 years I realised that I should probably rethink my strategy!

So over the last 3 years I embarked on the long and difficult journey of trial, error and major elimination.  For those that do not have a similar allergy, this may sound relatively easy but trust me - it isn't!  I can tell you that it was totally worth it, life is genuinely so much better!  I use a mild steroid cream once a month maximum, and that is only when I purposefully give myself a day off.  My skin is practically perfect - if I do say so myself :) and I really am a lot happier.

It would've been great to have people with the same allergy to discuss with along the way, but the odd comments I remember finding were dotted around a couple of forums, dated a few years back and pretty inconclusive.  In a world where allergies are becoming ever more common, I suddenly realised that there are plenty of people now discovering their allergies and in the same position as I was a few years back.  So why not start a place where people can come to share their stories, ask for advice, and just read posts that may give new ideas?

I have no idea how it'll pan out so we'll see how it goes...